I’ve written this post in my head five hundred times, but I’ve only had the time to put pen to paper a month after giving birth. Time seems to move much faster with a baby.
Being pregnant was very surreal for me. I don’t think it really hit me until the end, and even then, it felt like an out-of-body experience.
To prepare, I did a lot of research. I got the doula. I watched the educational videos on being a first-time parent. And still, nothing really prepares you for the first few weeks. I felt like a fish out of water—trying to figure out things like how to assemble a car seat and how to get the right latch during nursing sessions.
Things I wish I knew as a first-time mom:
- Newborns do not have a circadian rhythm for the first six weeks, roughly. I knew sleep would be tough to come by, but I highly underestimated it.
- Bring your hospital bag with you as much as possible after the 36th week. I had a hunch I should’ve had it with me at my 37th-week visit—which is when I was induced.
- Postpartum pre-eclampsia is real—and more common than you think. Monitor your blood pressure as much as possible in your third trimester. I exercised and ate as healthy as possible, but those efforts didn’t seem to prepare me for it.
- Accept all the help you can get. I was definitely bashful when family and friends volunteered, but I’m so grateful for those who cooked for our little family and watched the baby while I did simple things (like showering). Prepare a plan for volunteers, or night nurses.
- Mentally prepare for both a c-section and a vaginal birth. I was pretty hopeful for the latter, but we had to make the decision to go with the first option due to the position of the umbilical cord.
- Be prepared to stay in the hospital for at least two days after a c-section, especially if you’re experiencing pre-eclampsia.
- Ask as many questions as possible before hiring a doula. What is their philosophy on c-sections, if necessary? How often will they check in with you before delivery, and how (in-person or virtual—and what will be discussed)? When will they arrive after you’ve been admitted? Are any birthing classes included in your package? What assistance will be provided after you give birth?
- See a lactation specialist shortly after leaving the hospital. If you’re struggling with pumping or latching, consider checking your flange sizes or getting a second opinion on your feeding schedule. Most importantly, don’t be too hard on yourself—it’s okay if things feel difficult at first.
That’s it for now. Feel free to drop any questions in the comments—I’m happy to share more when I can.
Side note: I wanted to make this a video, but… cue crying baby in the background.